I just.

I don't like you.

Anyone that reads that and thinks 'Oh my goodness ... is she talking about me?!'
Don't panic. It's most probably not you.

♥

k.

Home early.

You know what I just did?

Here, you have a go.

1. Pull your keyboard wire so that you have enough slack.
2. Turn your keyboard upside down, rest one side of the keyboard on your desk and hold the opposite side with your one hand, and with the other hand lightly hit the bottom of your keyboard.
3. Yes, I know. gross.

I had bits of food, and pieces of paper, your average sneezy dust, eraser dust and a whole lot of crap. I guarantee the crap that comes out of your keyboard would be exactly the same as mine or worse, in case you don't do this regularly. If you have sexy mac keyboard, doom on you.

S'gusting.

EARLY SPRING CLEANING - starting with my keyboard. One step at a time.

Oh and subway cookies are delish.

♥

k.

Sick

I have... laryngitis. yay ... everyone stay away from me. hehehe. Not but seriously, I'm plagued (not with the actual plague .. but you know what I mean).

My eyes are TEARY (dangit), it sounds like everyone is far away and my nose feels like it's going to fall off. The throat feels like someone got a squid jig (pictured below) stuck it down my throat and then hung me.

My voice sounds hoarse like an old man, and to make matters worse, exams are in 2 weeks. Wow I feel so gross spluttering all over this keyboard.

On the bright side however, it is my last week of semester one, and then after exams I have 5 weeks of blissful holidays. YAY. AND ! I got 8.5 and 9.5 on my last chem pracs. I'm happy about that.

I should do this more often - that is, for every bad thing I say, I have to find one good thing too. So ... as a consequence, I have to say something good for yesterday's blog. Um ... I'm thankful that ... hmmm.... I don't have glandular fever or soemthing terrible that would actually stop me from sitting my exams and studying. That would suck. OH and I'm also thankful that I finished my 3 hours of psychology research participation as well (:

Yes so that is my 2 cents on today ... AND I'LL GET AROUND TO FIXING MY COMMENTS THING SOON.

:D

♥

k.

I hate how

Anyone that has a decent camera and enough money to buy a DSLR automatically becomes a photographer. Photography has become soemething so common now, I don't know whether to be happy or to despise the fact that although I've loved it for so long and developed and grown through it, I've gotten nowhere recently ... due to the fact that about every second person I meet has a DSLR - and the sheer reason that they have amazing pictures is due to their camera alone (and perhaps a slight interest in photography and some little knowledge of visually pleasing pictures)

Maybe this is just 'talk' that results from jealousy. At least I admit it.

Screw it. I'm buying a laptop, because it's something I need and I'll abandon my dream. Maybe sometime in the near future.

That brings me to my second rant.

I hate how I am good at nothing. Yes I know, I'll get the obligingly nice person say "Oh no, Kat, you're good at [insert pathetic response here] ..." But dead serious, tell me something I'm amazing at ... I hear nothing. Good see ? Exactly my point. Sure .. I'm probably fairly average at photoshop, photography .. the odd design of a birthday invitation or a card. But I'm not great at it - I can't draw to save my life, all those effects you see on my photoshopped photos? I get from tutorials. I judge nothing by my own eye, I have no sense in what 'looks' right, or is aesthetically pleasing. I'm good, perhaps, but I'm not great.

Just mediocre, and it's driving me insane. I have no direction in life, and for goodness sake, I'm doing Science at MelU where I'll end up getting a Bachelor of science and then what can I do with it? Oh yeah? What? Research. What a let down. (And yes, I'm doing a post graduate. In what? ... I don't know. - My point exactly) I'm not smart enough to get good in the GAMSAT and perhaps get into med... I HIGHLY doubt that, although the thought of saving people's lives and helping them feel better does appeal to me. BUT HEY. I'm not even smart enough for that.

"Oh then if you hate it so much, do something creative perhaps photography?" I'm not creative enough for that. I get ideas from borrowing others. Screw you.

I'm so sorry to my friends that read this and it sounds all depressing, but I'm dead serious that I hate being mediocre and average and plain... and not being amazing at something. At the least, an amazing talent or interest, would've guide my decisions. Oh, and sorry for being all over the place with this blog. It's got not structure.

I feel your judging eyes ... this is just the person that doesn't come out at all.








Until now.

Nevertheless,

♥

k.

tumblr

This has got to be the saddest image ever.

The deal:
Gabe (right) is a dad heading Basic Training in Texas for the Air Force, and then military school right after.
Scarlet (left) - or Scar - is his 2 year old daughter and she's gorgeous ...

They're saying goodbye, right before he leaves.

This image was taken by Scarlet's mum, Kait and she runs the blog unbeingdead.tumblr.com which is the only reason I log onto tumblr on a regular basis. In addition to dearscarlet.tumblr.com. It's amazing (: They're a perfectly gorgeous family.

♥

k.

P.S. I don't really blog in tumblr anymore... But if something's worth sharing, I'll share it/reblog it.

Yours truly,

40% of what I type doesn't reach recipients because I constantly rethink my reponse or I don't like what I say. Or I'm scared what they'll think of me.

♥

k.

Think of me

When you hear but you just don't listen
When you're looking but you just don't see
When you're thinking there's no rhyme or reason
Think of me, think of me

When you're getting to the end of a hard day
And you're thinking it's a long way home
When you're thinking that you're just plain crazy
Because you're on your own
Think of me

I will find you, I promise
I will make you believe,
That I'm in this crazy love for the long haul
So think of me, think of me

When you're laying on my favorite pillow
All you want to do is fall asleep
When you're gazing out the bedroom window
Please think of me, think of me

When you're driving down an empty highway
You're surrounded by the sky and sea
When you're seeing such a thing of beauty
Do you think of me? Think of me.

'Cause if I make you a promise
That's a promise that I'll keep
And I'm in this crazy love for the long haul
So think of me, think of me

And I'll be home soon
Home to you
'Cause if I make you a promise
That's a promise that I'll keep


♥

k. ft. rosi golan